so i just got the call from my therapist that i can come back thursday to see her if and ONLY if i can follow all treatment recommendations which at this time is ip treatment.. so ya FUCK ME... i knew it wouldnt happen and i shouldnt have had my hopes up but guess what? it doesnt matter - this gives me 2 weeks to lose this weight without needing to add lax tonight to keep the loss going... im tired of caring when all that anyone else cares about is oh u r too thin u need to gain weight... the only way u r gonna get better and stop purging is ip... well guess what im not purging anymore and im no where near thin enough so im just gonna do what i can and lose as much as i can! lets go Ana!
adding to the news i forgot that today is the meeting for my son for the ambassadors program... he has been selected to participate in which case he will get to travel all of next summer in Europe and learn celtic cultures... the meeting is an hr drive one way and it isnt until 7pm - good thing im not laxing or i would be really sick there and on the drive home! anyway so we got a surprise visitor which is always nice, he called first this time to make sure we werent at the gymn lol... anyway he is goofing with the boys and said he will stay while i take the oldest to the meeting - thank you God! i dont wanna have to deal with them there while trying to learn and understand what the options are and fees and such... Lord knows i dont have the money but if somehow i can find it and he wants to go after the meeting - i will find a way to make it happen! not gonna let my crap mess him up! what a grand opportunity and if i cant let him go because i cant get the money i think i will die! so here goes to hoping he gets a scholarship or maybe a sponsor or something - if he chooses to go that is... and here goes to finishing day 2 of my fast - gonna nap now so not too tired on that long drive!
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